Three Approach Adventure - The Worst & The Best

I've been going out for long walks to do some daygaming for the past couple of months. This is good bodily exercise as well as gives you more experience.

I'll tell you this: if you're sitting at home all day, or you're working in an environment where there aren't many attractive women, the first thing you need to do is desensitize yourself to their presence. If you're only seeing beautiful women in pictures, or worse, as porn, your innate approach anxiety is going to be increased fivefold.

Once you get used to being in the presence of beautiful women, approaching them becomes a bit less difficult. Once you begin your first few approaches, it becomes even less so.

To this regard I again return to a quote by Louis XIV:

“Habit is the most safe and most convenient mistress to render all things easy to us; the most arduous labor in itself insensibly becomes easy to those who are inured to it for a long time, and such dangers as at first astonish the multitude have so little effect upon those who are accustomed to them that they behold them undismayed.”

Today I went out and approached three women. The first was the worst rejection I've ever gotten. The third was the hottest girl I've approached yet. (If you want to know, the stories I choose to relay on this blog are the ones that are unique to me and that I learn the most from, that's why I emphasize this or that thing.)

The first one was a street approach. An attractive blonde was walking by. I sighted her without much time to think. An indirect opener (such as McQueen's Starbucks Opener) would probably have been better in this situation, but having no time to think, I just went direct and asked if she was going to walk out of my life forever.

Her reaction was a sarcastic "uhh...yeah...?"

And this was the worst rejection I've had so far.

This just again proves that any fear of rejection and the unknown is ridiculous. Nothing happens. I've taken and laughed at far worse stuff than this.

The second approach was in the park. This girl had a dog and I opened her about it. She was very talkative, but she was waiting for a landwhale of a friend. When the friend came along, I ejected. I didn't feel like competing for attention with the landwhale. I told myself had better things to do (and indeed, I did).

I pussied out of doing another approach. There was a sunbather that I wanted to talk to. I admit, at this point I'm still confounded with how to approach these girls. It's summer time and there are a lot of girls in bikinis soaking up sun at the parks. This one wasn't even reading or had headphones in, too, a common obstacle with these girls. Overall, I'm not too worried about this. I'll figure it out. The barrier is more psychological than anything else (as most things are).

However, as I was contemplating approaching the sunbather I noticed a very beautiful girl walk by. Tanned, long hair, red lipstick to contrast the tan, and very high heels. My brain was still in freeze mode while contemplating to approach the other girl, and she walked by.

After pussying out, I exited the park. I decided to walk down the avenue on the outskirts of the park because there were more girls there. Then I saw her again, moving to cross the street. My brain was telling me that this must have been fate.

Naturally, I took advantage and followed her. I saw that she was carrying one of those Louis Vuitton bags that every other girl carries. That was my opener. When we reached the end of the street, I looked at it and teased her about it.

We walked and talked for several blocks. It turns out she's a model, which is something I sort of suspected. I must say I'm better at making small talk than I thought I was. I'm a pretty talkative guy, and tend to dominate my conversations quickly. This can either be an asset or a curse when it comes to game.

When I asked her out for coffee, she told me she had a fiance. Whether it's true or not is irrelevant. However, what matters more is that she responded that she thought I was just being nice. This again tells me that injecting more masculine sexual energy into my approaches (especially when going indirect, and in the daytime where touching has to be kept to a minimum) is something I need to work on.

Nevertheless it was a good interaction that left us both happier for having had it (evidenced by the fact that she hugged me goodbye with an enthusiastic smile on her face). It was also quite telling to know that the hottest girl I've yet approached was also one of the nicest.

A year ago when I began this blog, the element of doubt was very much present. The beta voice in my head was telling me that I would never have been able to approach a girl that hot on the street in the daytime and ask her out. Yet here I am. It's taken consistent months of effort in multiple areas to overcome those psychological barriers, but here I am.

There are new obstacles now to be overcome, new challenges await, but it is these challenges that make us men. The betas shrink from them. The ones that rise to glory meet them with eagerness, as it means that life is not boring.

As an aside, I was listening to this old folk song today, and I think it sums up perfectly this drive for adventure and challenge that rumbles inside the heart of men seeking glory:

"Hark now the drums beat up again
For all true soldier gentlemen,
Then let us list and march, I say,
Over the Hills and far away.

(Chorus)
Over the hills and o'er the main
To Flanders, Portugal and Spain,
Queen Anne commands and we'll obey,
Over the hills and far away.

All gentlemen that have a mind,
To serve the queen that's good and kind,
Come list and enter into pay,
Then over the hills and far away.

No more from sound of drum retreat,
While Marlborough and Galway beat,
The French and Spaniards every day,
When over the hills and far away."